Given that definition, from what I have discovered with my own experience, love only comes in 2 form..
One is one sided love and the rare one, mutual love... Having this said, you can twist it the other way round, which is love or being loved... In a relationship, there's always a party who love the other one more, who gives more and do everything more... Whereas the other one, is usually the one being loved (passive and spoilt), just like how Alpha loves me... I consider it, me being loved by Alpha, so I'm more passive and spoilt by Alpha...
Mutual love means both love each other that much, equal level.. Which to me is the very rare kind of love you can find nowadays...
So in my three person relationship, Alpha loves me and I love Beta.... In a way I'm in the middle of everything, I see things through inside out and I understand perfectly clear on relationship situations...
When I first started my 3 person relationship, I met up with a wise blogger friend of mine early January this year, who told me that my love for Beta is merely "Infatuation"... , That is the time when I learnt of that word and find the real meaning behind it... Not only my friend mention this word, Alpha also said it to me recently...
Even after all the lies Beta had told me, I still try to forgive him... No matter how much Beta had hurt me in the past, I still love him... In addition, I tried so hard to understand Pieces (horoscope) in terms of their personal behaviour, what are they thinking and how they behave... I have taken away all Beta's suffering which his Ex has done to him, in return I absorbed all the pain to myself... Alpha has found a purpose from me, he found love and family which he had never felt in his life before... We are now staying together in Puchong (Yes Alpha had moved away from Klang since March 2012)...
Indeed I have suffered for 2 weeks now without Beta in the picture, I have not seen him for 9 days and tomorrow 25th is our anniversary date... Alpha has been around by my side all the time... With Alpha pouring out his unconditional love for me, trying to comfort me throughout my depression/mood swing moments, he often got himself burnt... I felt extremely guilty and terrible to drag him down into this.. Yes I love Alpha and I still have him beside me, but losing Beta is like losing a part of me.. Every time I look at Alpha, he reminded me of Beta, every time I think about our Japan trip next Chinese New Year and Beta is not going to join us, I felt miserable...
I need time to recover myself from this bad ending, I don't want Alpha to get involved, he is innocent... Did you know the only way to recover yourself from a wounded heart is when a new person comes into your life? That person will create new memories together with you, and overwrites all your sad ones... That's the quickest and most effective way to recover from a bad experience..
In my case, I have 2 lovers to begin with, losing one of them doesn't mean I can get a replacement just like that... No, I can only endure, let go, and let time flush away my pain...
It is not easy.....
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